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Let's just start with the previews so you know what kind of mood I was in by the time the movie started:
1. Why Him?
Oh, how the mighty have fallen. James Franco used to be so cute, too.
2. The Bye Bye Man
So...just another name for the Grim Reaper.3. Passengers
4. Collateral Beauty
Like the three ghosts of Christmas with a twist. Don't let the stellar cast fool you!
5. A Monster Calls
A knock-off Groot.
Ok, now that I've set the stage...
The Edge of Seventeen is about a girl named Nadine (played by Hailee Steinfeld) who is the most horrible teenager ever. Here's what makes her so terrible:
-Her best friend (okay, only friend) starts dating Nadine's brother, and Nadine FLIPS OUT. She's so mad at her friend and eventually tells her friend she has to choose between her brother and her. Even I knew in fourth grade that friends who tried to make you choose between friends weren't good friends at all.
-She messages some older guy from her school (she claims that juvi made him hotter) that she likes him, has for a long time, has always wanted to talk to him, wants to give him head...Wait, what?! She goes on to write that she wants him inside her and they could do it at Petland where he works. Yeah...So she already looks (is) crazy. But then when he actually texts her back and drives her to some seclude place to have sex, she acts surprised that he wants to jump her bones! When he tells her he doesn't want to get to know her, he just wants to have sex, she's the most upset that we've seen her in the entire movie (even more so than when her dad died!). She's crying hysterically, like her heart is completely broken. I mean, really? You couldn't see that from a mile away? AND this is the first time in the movie when she actually tries to dress normally and cute and look like a pretty girl. All for that dirtbag criminal. The irony.
-She makes assumptions about other people because of her own securities. She claims her brother is such a jerk for being good looking and having so many friends and being the perfect son, etc., and that he throws it in Nadine's face. BUT the truth is he doesn't! He's got his own problems (serious ones, like having to take care of his mom) and doesn't see his life as perfect or see himself as some son of God. She also thinks her teacher is a sad old man who nobody loves and jokes about his teacher salary, only to find out later that he has a beautiful wife and baby boy at home. She tries to make others feel bad about themselves because she hates herself so much.
-Speaking of God, she has an epiphany while sitting on the toilet (nice touch) that God has never been there for her and never done anything good for her. Hmm, like having a roof over her head, clothes to wear, and food to eat...? Aren't those blessings? Get a grip, girl. There are people in the world who have it SO much worse than you.
-She gets so mad at her brother that at one point she tells him the story of him crying after their dad died, and she said she wished that her brother would love her that much. But why would he?! She acts like a complete bitch ALL the time! I'm surprised he put up with her BS at all!
It's like the movie wants you to hate her. I understand trying to make her out to be a misfit in her uncoordinated outfits who's trying to find her own way, but the audience can't even relate to her because she's just a bad person. She even says in the movie that she feels like she's looking at herself from the outside and doesn't like what she sees. She tries to save it in the last 10-15 minutes of the movie (by actually being nice! What an idea!), but it's too late. The seeds have been sown.
Then I went to Bar Louie to drink away the memory of this movie. I heard this song in the bar, which instantly lifted my spirits; Stepbrothers is a much better movie.