Virtual Dating in COVID times

Several of my friends have asked me if I have gone on any virtual or video dates since the quarantine restrictions were put in place at the beginning of the pandemic. My answer is a resounding NO. Why, you might ask? Here's are a couple of reasons:

- I'm sick of video calls. I have to do them for work, so why would I want to do them in my free time? I can barely muster the enthusiasm to have a Zoom call with my friends, let alone a stranger. Screens already take up the majority of my waking moments, and I'd rather not add one more reason to stare at blue light that will inherently affect my sleep later. 

- This is the longest duration of time I've gone without feeling disrespected by men. Whenever I tell people this, they look sad and disappointed. Well, so am I. Dating for me is the equivalent of spending time with a man who patronizes me, objectifies my body, doesn't listen when I talk, doesn't care about my opinions, and puts himself before me every time. Actually, near the beginning of quarantine, a DC matchmaker sent out an email to her followers with a story from a man who said about his date, due to the circumstances, he "had to talk to her and get to know her." That's supposed to be encouraging?! Isn't that what all dating should be, not just when you have no other option? Quite discouraging, to say the least.

Subjecting myself to these behaviors online sounds even worse than in person: there's no opportunity to slam a door, spill a drink on his favorite shirt, slap him in the face, all those in-person cues that tell a man, "WTF is wrong with you?!" (Okay, I've never actually done any of those things, though those guys certainly deserved it, and then some.) I guess I could simply close my laptop, but there's little satisfaction in that, like hanging up on someone with your cell phone instead of the good ol' crash of an old-school telephone.

- There's no free food in virtual dating. Because of the aforementioned disrespect, along with the fact that a lot of dating conversations are awkward and/or boring (having communication/story-telling skills is highly underrated), the best part of the date tends to be the free food. And that's if he pays: men of my generation are using feminism as a crutch to keep their credit card debt slightly lower than it already is. So going on a virtual date, when I'm guaranteed a monotonous conversation ("What do you miss most about the 'before' times? What have you watched on Netflix? Aren't you tired of Zoom calls?") AND there are no free tacos or wine? I'm out.

- I'm not putting on make-up to sit at home. One of the double standards when it comes to dating is that women are supposed to glam themselves up, wearing a sexy outfit, high heels, and a face of make-up for a date; men can wear the same sweatshirt and sneakers every time they see you. It's already a chore to get ready for a date (You're just hoping your lipstick doesn't come off during that *hopefully* free meal.). So I'm not going to go through the rigmarole of putting on lipstick, eyeliner, mascara, and blush (which I realize isn't that much make-up compared to the thick foundation and false eyelashes some women wear) just to sit on my couch and stare at a computer screen. Photos don't do me justice, so how would a poorly-lit screen shot help my case? If you want to see me at my best, you're going to have to see me in person, which ain't gonna happen right now (or ever, let's be realistic).

So, no, I'm not virtual dating, I'm not seeing anyone IRL; I'm too busy making myself happy. 😀

*All GIFs came from Giphy.com.

Recipe: Peanut Butter Bacon Dog Treats

I love baking for myself, but since I've been spending a lot of time with my parents, that means I also spend a lot of time with their dogs. My mom feeds them lots of bones and treats, and sometimes I feel like those aren't the healthiest. I figured I could easily make my own dog treats.

I found this recipe on the Sally's Baking Addiction blog and thought I'd give it a try: 

Ingredients

• 1 cup natural creamy peanut butter
• 3/4 cup non-fat milk
• 1 large egg (or 1/4 cup unsweetened applesauce)
• 2 cups whole wheat flour
• 1 tablespoon baking powder
• 1/3 cup oats
• 2-3 strips cooked bacon, chopped

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 325 degrees (F). Line two large baking sheets with parchment paper or silicone baking mats. Set aside.
2. In a large bowl, gently mix the peanut butter, milk, and egg together with a wooden spoon or rubber spatula. Add the flour and baking powder. You may need to turn the dough out onto a floured work surface and use your hands to work in the flour. Mix in the oats and bacon. The dough is extremely thick and heavy.
3. Using a floured rolling pin, cut into shapes using a cookie cutter or a knife. Arrange on the baking sheets. Bake for 18-20 minutes, or until very lightly browned on the bottom. Remove from the oven, and flip the treats to bake the other side 10-12 more minutes.
4. Allow to cool completely before serving to your pup. Cover and store leftovers at room temperature for up to one week or in the refrigerator for up to two weeks. They also freeze well for up to two months.

This is not a very good recipe, which I would have noticed right away had I actually read through the full instructions before choosing the recipe (usually I just look at the ingredient list). The biggest flaw is that nowhere does Sally tell us how thick the treats should be, or how large they should be. Even in her blog post, she shows pictures of treats of all shapes and sizes; itty-bitty hearts would NOT need as much time in the oven as a big, bone-shaped treat. Everyone knows that the bigger and/or thicker the cookie, the longer it needs in the oven, and vice versa. So that left me guessing as to how large and thick I should make my circular treats. On top of that, this dough was hard to work with and mix in the flour, which is just frustrating. It was so annoying that I didn't even bother putting in the oats, and I just squished little pieces of bacon onto the top of the treats instead of attempting to work them into the already tough dough. And I pretty much never roll out dough because that's just another pain in the ass. I just took a chunk of dough, pressed it into a somewhat circular shaped, and called it a day.

Since these were for dogs and not people, I didn't really care as much (not that I really care that much when baking for myself, either). I didn't fully incorporate the flour (plus I used regular white flour, not whole wheat flour), I didn't bother flipping the treats (I just cooked them for 15 minutes), and I didn't care if they tasted good (which they don't. The texture is not bad, but because there's no sugar like there would be for people cookies, they were pretty bland). When I fed one to my mom's puppy, I couldn't tell if she even liked the treats, but dogs will eat just about anything, right? So maybe not worth the trouble...

The Holidays in Hilton Head

This year, my parents and I spent the holidays in Hilton Head Island in South Carolina. Don't worry: we didn't fly or mingle with strangers. We spent more than three weeks down south, and it was a very nice vacation. Here's how we spent our time:

1. Baking. If you already follow my blog, you know that I baked Rumchata cookies and banana oat muffins. I also made some dog treats for my parents' dogs (that post to come) so they didn't have to eat raw hide bones all the time. The kitchen always smelled good!

2. Sunbathing. I wasn't actually sure if I'd be able to get some sun this trip, given that it's the middle of winter. But warm weather is the best part of heading south at the end of the year. We had a few warm, sunny days that were great for laying by the pool. While the water was too cold to swim in, and the breeze could get a little chilly, I was thrilled to be able to enjoy one of my favorite summer activities in the dead of winter.

3. Shopping. I think this is a part of every holiday season, although this year I think a lot of us did most of our gift-buying online. But once we were down here, my mom and I hit up the Tanger Outlets in Blufton as well as our usual favorite spots like Marshalls and T.J. Maxx. I mostly bought athletic leggings, since I haven't had to wear real clothes since last March.

Image found here

4. Exercising. My mom and I bought an intro month at the local Pure Barre studio to keep fit during this time. I was already set on this plan, and when I told her about it, she wanted to join me, appointing me as her motivation to go. We went almost every morning, which was a great way to start the day. We also took daily walks along the beach with the dogs, and I did a couple of workout videos on our off-days. My dad and I played some tennis and went bike riding, too, so we had varied exercise during our trip. 

5. Holiday-things. Of course Santa visited us while we were on the island. We didn't do too many gifts since it was just the three of us, and my dad probably got the most of all of us! Normally I would write a blog post dedicated to the gifts I got, but this time around the gift-giving was so anti-climactic after a year like 2020 (plus, I can buy myself the things I really want). If you're interested in anything I'm re-gifting, check out my Poshmark site. 

6. Watching TV. Other than sleeping, this is how I spend the majority of my free time (since there's little more we can do). My mom and I have been binge-watching (on-and-off since the pandemic started) How to Get Away with Murder, and it's been fun having that be "our" thing. We watch 3-5 episodes a night when we're really on a roll. We also watched holiday movies, including classics like Home Alone, Elf, and The Santa Clause.

Image found here

7. Reading. To counteract the brain-mushing from all the TV, I made sure to read during the day as well as before bed. I read Mindy Kaling's second book, a cute children's book on unicorns, and a book about a father and son who survived 5+ years in the concentration camps during the Holocaust (I, like many Jews, have a sick fascination with this sort of thing.).

8. Eating. Maybe this goes without saying, but we did a lot of take out during our trip (who wants to cook on vacation?). We have our favorites down here: the pizza from Super Baked, the chicken salad from Hinchey's, and the enchiladas from Aunt Chilada's. We did try some new places, like New York City Pizza and Mi Tierra, but we're creatures of habit.

Sorry for the lack of photos, but it's just been a chill, relaxing trip!