Birthday in Quarantine

My birthday was yesterday, and I can unequivocally say it was the most boring birthday EVER. This is especially so compared to last year when I went to Las Vegas with my sister and had a day full of parties at home a few days after that (and two years ago I was traveling in South Carolina with my mom).

Yes, I turned 31 and still insisted on wearing a tiara, my "birthday girl" pin, and a unicorn sweatshirt.

 But my birthday is my favorite holiday, so I wasn't going to let it pass by without some sort of celebration. My parents did buy me some gifts, so I opened my presents over a pancake breakfast. 

My gifts included a NYC-themed toiletry bag, a set of unicorn magnets, and a mini emery board (with llamas!)

I did appreciate the random birthday emails I received from the Junior League of Washington, Fitzgerald Hyundai Rockville, and Bank of America. And it was fun to see which of my friends actually remembered my birthday without having to be reminded by Facebook (I don't have one!), or LinkedIn (where I only received birthday wishes from people I haven't spoken to in years or people I don't know). More people knew my birthday than I thought!

After the mail arrived, I received some more birthday cards and presents from my aunt:

Are you seeing a theme here?

 That night we enjoyed Moet champagne and Funfetti cupcakes, which was the highlight of my day. Food is an important part of any celebration!

Cards from family and friends

Okay, so my birthday really wasn't that bad (I've changed my mind since the beginning of this post.). Plus, I realize that during these scary, uncertain times, I need to remember the true blessings I have, birthday or not: my family, my health, a roof over my head, food in my belly, electricity, literacy...the list goes on and on. I am very blessed, and am looking forward to my 31st year of life!

Recipe: Cherry Pie Bars

Image found here

My mom and I wanted to bake something, and we were thinking about what ingredients we already had at home. We had some canned pie filling, but no pie crust. So I Googled recipes that used pie filling in anything other than pie. And I found this recipe from Cooking Classy.

Ingredients

• 3 cups all-purpose flour
• 1.5 tsp baking powder
• 3/4 tsp salt
• 1.75 cups granulated sugar
• 1 cup unsalted butter, softened
• 3 large eggs
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• 1/4 tsp almond extract
• 1.5 cans (21 oz) cherry pie filling

Glaze

• 1 cup powdered sugar
• 1/2 tsp vanilla extract
• 1/4 tsp almond extract
• 2.5-3 tbsp half-and-half

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Butter a 13x9-inch baking dish (for thinner bars, use a 15x10-inch baking dish).
2. In a large bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder, and salt. Set aside. In a mixing bowl, use a mixer to whip together the butter and sugar until pale and fluffy.
3. Mix in eggs one at a time, then blend in vanilla and almond extracts. With the mixer set on low speed, slowly add in the dry ingredients and mix until combined. Reserve and set aside 1.5 cups of the batter, then spread the remaining batter evenly into the prepared baking dish.
4. Top with cherry pie filling, spreading it into an even layer. Dollop small spoonfuls of the remaining batter evenly over the top.
5. Bake in preheated oven for 30-37 minutes (near lesser time for 15x10 and greater time for 13x9). Remove from oven and allow to cool completely on a wire rack. 
6. For the glaze: In a small mixing bowl, whisk together all glaze ingredients, adding enough half-and-half to reach your desired consistency. Pour into a resealable bag, seal bag and cut a small tip from one corner, then drizzle over top of the cooled bars. Allow the glaze to set (to set it quicker, chill in the freezer), then cut into squares.

I will admit that I took the liberty to type up the directions to allow for more clarity, including adding articles to nouns. But I did leave #5 the same, because I thought those directions were a bit obvious (although perhaps not for inexperienced bakers, like I wrote about in my last blog post!).

Okay, so it doesn't look quite like the original...

I used a large can of raspberry filling instead of cherry, since that's what we had on hand. And my mom didn't want to use her Teflon-coated 13x9-inch pan in fear of us ripping the Teflon while cutting the squares. So we used a 9x9-inch pan, meaning these squares were THICC. (Also, it needed to cook longer [as expected due to the thickness], so it was in the oven for 42 minutes.) In the end we didn't even cut them into squares: we just ladled ourselves a piece! I wouldn't recommend using the smaller pan like I did, but I'm glad they still tasted good; the ratio of dough fruit filling was just a little off.

And just like my last blog post, I didn't bother to make the glaze/icing. This dessert already has so much sugar; it doesn't need more! Plus, it tastes delicious just as it is.

Recipe: Cinnamon Roll Bread

Just like everyone else, I have been baking during the quarantine (I've already made chai-spiced banana bread and confetti bars). I saw this recipe from Jennifer Fisher while scrolling through Twitter and thought I'd give it a go. The list of ingredients and the directions were pretty short, so I thought it would be easy, too.

Kind of looks like any other, nondescript bread. And that's cinnamon on top; it's not burnt!

I will admit that I didn't read them that closely, though, so that was a bit of a mistake. For one, I didn't have any milk, so I went with half light cream, half Lactaid. Also, the directions themselves from a baker's standpoint aren't very good (see my comments below). So this was a gamble recipe.

Ingredients

For Bread:

• 1 c. organic sugar
• 2 c. organic flour
• 1 tbsp. baking powder
• 1/2 tsp. salt
• 1 organic egg
• 1 c. milk
• 1/3 c. vegetable oil

For "Swirl In" :

• 2 tsp. cinnamon
• 1/3 c. organic sugar

For Topping:

• 4 tbsp. butter, softened
• 2 c. powdered organic sugar
• 1 tsp. vanilla
• 3 tbsp. milk substitute

Directions

1. Preheat over to 350 degrees - I think you mean oven, right? And are we talking Fahrenheit or Celsius?
2. Combine the "swirl-in" ingredients
3. Combine the sugar, flour, baking powder and salt - No Oxford comma. *judging*
4. Beat the egg, milk and oil
5. Grease the loaf pan and pour half of the mixture, followed by half of the cinnamon sugar mixture to swirl in - Notice at no point are we told to mix the wet and dry ingredients together. After seeing some of the baking "fails" from quarantine, some people need true step-by-step instructions!
6. Pour in the remaining batter (the pan should only be 3/4 full) and swirl in remaining cinnamon sugar
7. Bake for 1 hour
8. Allow to cool and remove from the pan
9. Drizzle the icing on top

Along with my milk situation and the fact that my pan was only about half-full instead of 3/4 full, I wasn't sure how it would turn out. In the end, the bread (cake) tasted good, but it was a bear to get out of the loaf pan. I guess I didn't spray it enough, especially in the corners. I might recommend lining the pan with foil and then spraying it, just so you'll have an easier time getting the bread out (and it helps with faster clean-up, too).

I didn't bother to make the topping/icing since I figured the bread would last longer without it (and the bread would be easier to store). I can always heat up some store-bought icing and drizzle it on top when I feel like it. Oh, and I probably don't need to say this because I'm a no-BS, practical kinda lady, but non of the ingredients I used were organic. Nobody has the time (or the funds) for that!

Recipe: Confetti Bars

My mom and I wanted to make a festive dessert for Easter (yes, my  celebrate both Easter and Passover. Read my Seder blog post here). When I came across this recipe from the Chelsea's Messy Apron blog, I thought it looked so fun and yummy!

Ingredients

• 12 tablespoons (1.5 sticks) unsalted butter, at room temperature
• 1 cup white granulated sugar
• 1/2 cup light brown sugar, lightly packed
• 1 large egg
• 1 large egg yolk
• 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
• 2 cups + 2 tablespoons white all-purpose flour
• 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
• 1/2 teaspoon fine sea salt
• 1 and 1/4 cups white chocolate chips, divided
• 3 cups miniature marshmallows
• 3/4 cup spring-colored M&M's
• 1-3 tablespoons spring-colored sprinkles

Instructions

1. PREP: Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Grease a 9x13-inch pan with cooking spray and line with parchment paper (I don't recommend lining with foil). These bars are sticky so you do want the parchment paper.
2. WET INGREDIENTS: In a large bowl, combine 12 tablespoons room-temperature butter with the 1 cup white sugar and 1/2 cup light brown sugar in a medium sized bowl. Beat with hand mixer (or in a stand mixer) until light and creamy. Add in the egg, egg yolk, and 2 teaspoons vanilla. Mix until combined.
3. DRY INGREDIENTS: In a separate large bowl, combine the 2 cups + 2 tablespoons white flour, 1/2 teaspoon baking soda, and 1/2 teaspoon salt. Stir. Add wet ingredients to dry ingredients and stir until just combined. With a wooden spoon, stir in 1 cup of white chocolate chips and stir until combined.
4. BAKE: Press the cookie dough into the prepared 9x13-inch pan. Bake the bars for 22-26 minutes or until the top is no longer glossy and edges are ever-so-slightly browned. Remove from the oven and immediately top with the miniature marshmallows. Return to the oven for 1 minute and 30 seconds.
5. FINISHING: Gently press the marshmallows down a little. Sprinkle the remaining 1/4 cup white chocolate chips evenly over the bars. Sprinkle the 3/4 cup M&M's evenly over the bars. Scatter the sprinkles evenly over the bars.
6. SERVE: Let cool completely (these bars take 1-3 hours to really set up) and then cut with a hot, sharp knife (run the knife under hot water, dry, make a slice, repeat). Confetti Bars are best enjoyed within 1-2 days; after that the marshmallows become unpleasant.

I didn't have white chocolate chips, so I used regular ones instead. And on top of the marshmallows I used sprinkles and crushed up Robin's eggs. These bars taste really good and are pretty easy to make! I definitely recommend this recipe!

Quarantine Seder

Image found here

Originally, my family had planned to visit my grandmother in New York City this coming weekend to celebrate a belated Passover together. BUT, clearly that didn't happen. Not only could we not even go out of state, but my grandma is actually in the hospital with the coronavirus; we can't go up there for a festive occasion or to be with her while she is sick.

As the Jewish matriarch of the family, my paternal grandmother was always the one to cook the Seder. It was only until after she moved into a senior living situation where she didn't have a real kitchen that she started celebrating at her synagogue and eating the festive meal out. But since my parents and I are stuck at home, we had to do Seder on our own for the first time.

Notice the Easter egg place mat in the background. Mixed family! 

I was very proud of our Seder plate. We didn't have a lamb shank, so the chicken leg had to do (sorry). And it's the first time we included an orange for feminism/inclusivity (read that story here).

I made charoset for the first time, and it was so easy! I found this recipe on Epicurious, but you know me: I changed the ingredients up a bit.

Ingredients

• 3 medium Gala or Fuhi apples (peeled, cored, and finely diced)
• 1.5 cups walnut halves (slight;y toasted, cooled, and coarsely chopped)
• .5 cup sweet red wine
• 1.5 teaspoons ground cinnamon
• 1 tablespoon packed brown sugar

The directions are so easy because all you have to do is mix the ingredients together, and voilà! I used pecans instead of walnuts (I did not toast them.). I also didn't want to bother buying sweet kosher wine (let's be honest: nobody likes that stuff), so I used some random V-8 berry juice that I had; worked like a charm!

Image found here

My mom also made matzoh balls for the first time, and they were fantastic! I thought they were just as good as my grandma's (but don't tell her that!). We didn't use my grandmother's recipe; hers was too complicated with separating the eggs, whipping the whites into peaks, using chicken fat (which we didn't have), chilling the mixture for an hour... Instead, we just used the recipe on the canister of the matzoh meal, and it was great!

Ingredients

• 2 tablespoons vegetable oil
• 2 large eggs, slightly beaten
• .5 cups matzoh meal
• 2 tablespoons chicken or vegetable broth
• 1 teaspoon salt

Directions

• In a bowl, beat the eggs. Then add the oil, matzoh meal, and salt. Blend together. Add broth and mix until uniform.
• Cover and chill in the refrigerator for about 20 minutes. In the meantime, bring six cups of water to a boil.
• Remove chilled matzoh ball mixture from the refrigerator. Wet hands and form batter into matzoh balls, ~1 inch in diameter.
• Reduce heat. Drop matzoh balls into pot of boiling water.
• Cover tightly and simmer until thoroughly cooked, about 30-40 minutes.

We actually boiled the matzoh balls right in chicken broth instead of water; they're going in the chicken soup anyway! We also added shredded carrots and diced mushrooms to the broth to give the soup some more flavor and color. My grandmother's recipe called for adding nutmeg to the matzoh ball mixture, so we did do that in her honor. I always thought matzoh balls would be a complicated Jewish food to make, but they're really easy!

Perhaps everything went more quickly because it was just the three of us, but we seemed to breeze through the Maxwell House haggadah. Of course we didn't read everything, but we read most of what we would usually do at a family seder, and it felt like we got to the festive meal in just a few minutes. Thank goodness; we were hungry!

Happy holidays, everyone!

Favorite COVID/Coronavirus Parody Songs

Since most of us are stuck at home for the foreseeable future, Netflix, Amazon Prime, and YouTube are seeing more action than ever before. The only time my eyes leave a screen is if I'm sleeping or taking a shower (the latter of which is at a bare minimum these days).

So as I was going down the YouTube rabbit hole one day (I can't tell you which day; they all run together), I found these tiny nuggets of joy to bring a momentary smile to my face before returning to the seriousness of reality.

Enjoy:

My Corona (based on the song My Sharona by the Knack)

Coronavirus Rhapsody (based on Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody)

Stayin' Inside (based on Stayin' Alive by the Bee Gees)

Do Re Mi - COVID 19 version (here's the original version)

Hello (based on Adele's Hello)

And here are some inspired by Disney:

Disney Characters in Quarantine

Belle - The Coronavirus Version

I hope these brighten your day, even just for a little bit!