Tuesday, January 16, 2024

Interfusion Festival 2023

This past weekend was my SEVENTH time going to the Interfusion Festival! I was blown away the first time I went (scroll to the bottom to read about my experiences in previous years), and it's had me coming back ever since. The festival has certainly changed and evolved over time, but at its core, it's still about creating a community of openness, acceptance, vulnerability, positivity, and exploration. And who couldn't use more of that in their lives?

As usual, I took a variety of types of workshops and also tried to take classes with both instructors I didn't know and ones I already knew I really liked. Here are some of the stand-outs for me from this year's festival:

Soul & Skin: Authentic Relating in Dance

I didn't even know what "authentic relating" was until I discovered it at the festival a few years ago. It's about being your true self and expressing your truth to others. The leads of this workshop, Sara Ness and Geof Krum, were really fun and good at explaining and demonstrating the exercises. And they were creative, too! We introduced ourselves to other participants using the "Rock, Paper, Scissors, Consent" game, in which you only gave a more familiar greeting if the other person consents first. We played a "stick game" with a partner in which each person, using only one finger, pressed into the end of a pencil, and you had to hold enough tension on both ends to not drop the pencil as you walked around together in partnership. Who knew you could have that much fun with an unsharpened pencil! We also did a hand massage exercise with a partner, during which one of your hands was massaged and you used the other hand to "rate" the touch on a one-to-five scale. Someone said, "Giving feedback is a gift to the other person," and I thought that was so beautiful: offering feedback isn't criticism or rejection, but more of helping someone else understand who you are and what you desire. We then moved into groups of four and each person had a turn to be the center of attention, asking the others three to touch him/her "with the intention of BLANK." The intention of touch means just as much as the touch itself! I really liked this workshop and would definitely take it again!


Deeper: Conscious Intimacy Revealed

I had never done a workshop with the Blackins from Our Temple in the Trees before, but their work reminded me of previous workshops I've done before with Monique Darling and Peter Petersen from Everyday Tantra. For most of the workshop I was in a group with two young women who had never been to the Interfusion Festival before. While they may have had more sexual experiences than I have had (one seemed to know a lot about stripping...), they were not as comfortable outwardly speaking about their own sexual desires, which meant they weren't going deeper as the name of the class suggests. But I still enjoyed doing the exercises with them. In the first one we each had to express our (sexual) desires, and the other two people would ask what the roadblocks were to achieving those desires as well as offered potential solutions. In the second exercise, we each had a turn being the center of attention, and we would tell the other two how/where we wanted to be touched. They gave me SUCH a good scalp massage, and my body involuntarily shivered when the one with really long nails scratched my back. SUCH good tingles! I ended up doing a very similar exercise in a different class the next day, but this first time was more fun. I saw these girls throughout the weekend and had fun meeting up with them.

Rhythmic Seduction: The Art of Sensual Chair Dance

Of course I had heard of chair dancing and have seen it in movies (Flashdance, Striptease, Save the Last Dance), but I had never tried it myself. So I was curious to learn more, especially if it could spice things up at home! Gigi Holliday was the instructor, and while 9:00 a.m. may not have been the best time slot to try to memorize a dance routine, she pushed through and made it fun for all of us. She's a professional burlesque performer, so she knows what she's talking about! Her main lessons were "go slooooooow" and "point your damn toes!" I had such a good time, and I look forward to performing for my fiancé; I hope he likes it!

That's me in the rainbow leopard print shirt! Photo credit from the Interfusion Festival.

Qigong Movement and Meditation

Originally during this time slot I was going to take a class on lifts in dance, but when I watched the instructors demo what they were going to teach, I knew I was NOT prepared for that kind of acrobatics! So I quickly stepped out and made my way to Dante Baker's qigong workshop. Qigong is similar to Tai Chi or yoga in that it is a meditation practice with movement. Baker took us through several different movements, most of which are in time with your breath and can either be done from one spot or actually moving around a space. We started by hitting (sometimes punching?) our muscles to get them warmed up and to get the blood flowing (we focused a lot on the kidneys). Some of the movements were named after animals, like turtle, or dragon, which were fun, and a lot of them involved balance and keeping a soft bend in your knees to really help with fluid movements. I am not very good at static meditation (my mind always seems to wander), but with movement meditation like qigong, I find it's easier to focus on the present. I would love to find more opportunities to do qigong for sure!

He also did a sound bath healing workshop that I really enjoyed. He can play so many different musical instruments and makes it such a relaxing atmosphere. Photo credit from the Interfusion Festival.



Conscious Communications: Let's Talk About Sex!

Thomas Daily II, or "Major Tom" as he likes to be called, is a great facilitator! During this session, he was funny and charismatic but also thoughtful and understanding. I thought this workshop was both educational and self-reflective, which I really appreciated.

He talked about how the sex education we receive in the US doesn't really cover the idea of pleasure; there is still a focus on guilt or shame around sex. Even the idea of talking about sex is still somewhat taboo, and he emphasized the importance of open communication, especially around desires and kinks. He used the acronym BDSM, but not in the way you think. Before having sex with someone, you should have the BDSM conversation: discuss Boundaries, Desires, Sexual health (i.e. how often are you tested for STIs, are you HIV positive, etc.), and Meaning (Is this just a one-night stand? Do we have real feelings for each other?). I thought that was clever and helpful. The group also discussed how, when someone tells you "no" to something you desire, you don't have to take it as rejection: if you had never asked the person, you'd get the same result (i.e. it didn't happen), or that person is just speaking their truth and honoring their own needs (and if they can honestly tell you "no," you can be more trusting of their "yes" later on for something else). Major Tom also brought up the Erotic Blueprints, which I was telling another participant about just a few minutes before then!

For the actual exercises we did, I enjoyed the focus on how sex and sexual desires is very much a gray area; there isn't a lot of black and white. We did a spectrum exercise in which we would all take a spot on a line where opposites were on either end (e.g. homosexual-heterosexual, dominant-submissive, kinky-vanilla, etc.). For another exercise, we paired up with another person, and as Major Tom would call out different kinks, you would talk to your partner about whether you would or would not do that thing and why (but in a positive way! No use to "yuck someone else's yum"). These exercises made me think of things in a different way, either things I had never considered or heard of before (I had never heard of the term "bi-sensual" before, but it's like bisexual without actual penetrative sex) or things that I may have thought of but I had never talked out loud about (like body worship, which I think is really cool but I've never tried it). I definitely give props to the people who were willing to openly tell the larger group about their desires, fears, etc. That's what makes the Interfusion Festival such a great place!

Read about my past experiences at the festival:

2023

2022

2020

2019

September 2017 (the only year they hosted the festival twice)

February 2017

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