Thursday, May 30, 2013
Starting off as friends
I don't believe in starting out a romantic relationship as friends. Now, I'm not saying that if you did meet your special someone as friends that your relationship is invalid. That's just not the road I choose to take.
For one, I think that chemistry should be there from the get-go. Yes, the chemistry you have for a friend can blossom into romance. But I think that if a man wants you, he should be physically attracted to you as soon as he meets you; ideally, you think he's pretty cute, too. I concede that the mental chemistry can take a couple dates, but if it's not there after a little while, I'm not patient enough to wait for it to come around. That "spark" should be there right away. That's the feeling that makes you want to date someone!
Starting off as friends can make you feel safe and secure, something you should want in a relationship. You already know each other, you've met each other's friends, there's less mystery and doubt. BUT say you're friends, you eventually start dating, and then you break up. Now, not only have you lost your boyfriend, but most likely it's going to be an awkward friendship, too. Quite frankly, if I have a great friendship with a guy, I'm not going to mess that up by sleeping with him. I've always said I'd rather have a friend for a lifetime than a lover for a night.
It's like Harry says in When Harry Met Sally: "Men and women can't be friends. The sex thing gets in the way." I can't agree more. While I do have a couple of male friends, I guarantee that they think I'm cute, and if I wanted to kiss them they'd be more than open to it. But they're stuck in the friend-zone with me.